Choosing Your Goal

A Purposeful Goal

Before we start you will need to:

1. Choose your Goal

2. Pick a Stake

1. Choosing the Right Goal

Picking the right goal is key to setting yourself up for success. Two crucial factors to consider are:

Why? – Are you doing this for the right reasons? A goal should matter to you, not just be something you think you should do.
Achievability – Is the goal realistic given your current situation and resources?

From experience, I see people often struggle with goals because:

They choose something based on external pressure rather than personal meaning.
They try to go from Zero to Hero overnight, committing to an unsustainable 20-hour-a-week effort.

Step 1: Define Your Why

Before setting a goal, ask yourself:

What excites or inspires me about this?
If no one else knew I was doing this, would I still want it?
How will achieving this improve my life?
Am I doing this out of guilt, obligation, or comparison?

Your goal should align with your values and desires, not external expectations.

It's an opportunity to shift you identity towards who you want to become.

Step 2: Identify Potential Obstacles

Now, consider the challenges ahead:

What has stopped me from achieving this before? Do I have the time, energy, and resources to commit?
What habits or mindset shifts will I need?

Anticipating obstacles helps you prepare and adjust instead of giving up when things get tough.

Step 3: Make It Clear and Achievable

A strong goal is specific, realistic, and measurable.

Instead of saying, “I want to get fit,” define it clearly:

Habit:

❌ “Exercise 3x a week”. That’s too vague.

✅ “Workout at the gym 3x/week for at least 30min, Yoga and walking don’t count.”

❌ “Study Spanish from 7-8am every day”. If you start at 7.10am, it’s a technical fail.

✅ “Study Spanish for 1h/day on weekdays”

❌ “Wake up every day at 7am”, what if you forget to set your alarm one day?

✅ “”Wake up at 7am 19/21 times”, allowing for 2 cheat days.

Goal:

❌ “Study a lot on my course”. That’s way too vague.

✅ “Finish studying Chapters 1-4 of my course.”

❌ “Lose 5kg”. It’s just about impossible

✅ “Lose 2kg with a target of 72kg”

Ask yourself:

What exactly do I want to achieve? (Be specific.)
What does success look like? (How will I know I’ve done it?)

Final Check: Does This Goal Feel Right?

Before locking it in, ask yourself one last time:

Does this excite me?
Am I confident I can stick with it?
Does it fit into my current life without overwhelming me?

If the answer is YES, you’re ready to commit.

If not, tweak it until it feels like a challenge you want to take on, not something you’re forcing yourself into.

> Now, define your goal and COMMIT to it! ✊

2. Pick a Stake?

Rewards and Consequences

Once you’ve defined your goal, the next step is ensuring you follow through. One of the best ways to do this is by setting stakes.

A reward f or completing the challenge, a consequence for failing completely, and two redemptions for when you slip along the way.

People often rely on motivation alone, but that fades. What keeps you going is knowing there’s something to gain if you succeed, and something to lose if you don’t, and a clear path to recover if you stumble.

The Three-Strike System

You get TWO chances to slip and recover.

Strike 1: Redemption 1

You miss your commitment (skip a day, miss your weekly target, etc.)
You self-report to the group within 24 hours
You execute Redemption 1 immediately (e.g., 24h digital detox, 24h fast, post a public accountability video)
You post proof to the group
You continue the challenge

⚡️

Strike 2: Redemption 2

You slip again
Same process: self-report, execute Redemption 2, post proof
You're still in the game, but this is your last chance

⚡️

Strike 3: Challenge Fail

You miss a third time
You immediately pay your Consequence
Challenge over (or you continue without eligibility for the reward—your choice)

❌

🏆

If you make it to Day 21 with 0-2 slips (and completed your redemptions), you WIN and get your reward.

Examples of Effective Stakes

Redemptions: Your Recovery Path:

Pick two actions you're reluctant to do but can execute immediately when you slip:

Examples:

24-hour digital detox (no phone, no internet)
24-hour fast (water only)
Cold shower every day for 3 days
Public accountability post (video or written confession)
Donate $20 to a charity (or cause you dislike)
Wake up at 5am for 3 days straight
Do 100 push-ups in one day

Your redemptions should be:

- Uncomfortable enough to motivate you NOT to slip

- Survivable enough that you'll actually do them (not hide and lie)

- Executable within 24-48 hours

FINAL Reward: Celebrating Success

Treat Yourself: Buy something meaningful: new gear, a trip, or a special meal.
Experience a Perk: Give yourself extra leisure time, a weekend getaway, or a guilt-free binge of your favorite show.
Upgrade Your Life: Invest in a course, a tool, or something that enhances your future.
Public Acknowledgment: Share your success with friends or on social media (if that motivates you).

FINAL Consequence: Complete Failure

Financial Penalty: Set aside money that goes to charity or someone you dislike if you don’t follow through.
Public Commitment: Announce your goal and consequence to friends, making it embarrassing to back out.
Restriction: Ban yourself from a favorite activity (e.g., no social media, no favorite drink) until progress is made.
Help you Accountability Partner: Give 8 hours of your time to help your partner in any way they need it

Making Rewards & Consequences Work for You

To make this system effective, ask yourself:

What reward would genuinely excite me?
What consequence would I really want to avoid?
What two redemptions are uncomfortable but doable?
Who can help hold me accountable?

When the reward, consequence, AND redemptions are all meaningful, they create the exact push you need when motivation dips.

The redemptions give you grace—you're allowed to be human and slip twice. But they also have teeth—you can't just apologize and move on. You have to DO something uncomfortable to earn your way back in.

> Now, choose your reward and consequence, and commit to making your goal happen! 👍

John Smith

GOAL: I COMMIT to...

WHY?: This is important to me because....

STAKE:

If I Complete the Challenge: [Your Reward]
If I Fail (3 strikes): [Your Consequence]
Redemption 1 (first slip): [Action you'll take]
Redemption 2 (second slip): [Action you'll take]